.empatyzer / stories← Back to EmpatyzerPL
32 / 55

Differences that change a conversation

When I was your age

Experience and someone else’s situation

Marek tries to help Olek with a story from his own youth. Olek hears a comparison when he needs help with his current situation.

Download the full comicPage ↗PNGSVGPPTX
Olek, seated in his wheelchair, explains a scope and deadline problem to Marek.
I don’t know how to solve this without blowing the deadline.
Marek answers with a story from his youth, convinced that he is helping Olek.
When I was your age, nobody held our hand. You worked until it was done.
Marek expands his story while Olek grows quiet and feels misunderstood.
Back then I worked through the night and…
But that isn’t my problem.
Marek finishes with an encouraging gesture while Olek responds without conviction.
You’ll manage. You just have to want it.
Mm-hm.
Marek first asks what help Olek needs, and Olek points to items that could be removed from the scope.
Okay. What exactly do you need from me?
Help me decide what we can drop.
Em, the Empatyzer coach
Marek offers Olek his own success story because he sees experience as valuable help. Olek hears a comparison suggesting that he should manage too. The mentor’s good intention becomes a judgement of a situation he has not yet understood. Before sharing your own story, ask what kind of help the other person needs now. Experience should serve their situation, not obscure it.